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    Well jingle my bells and roast my chestnuts - I’m in a holiday mood!

    My wine is mulling and my eggs are nogging. I’m gonna gorge on sugar cookies and rosé, put Jimmy Stewart on the TV, and wrap the shit out of these presents.

    The Festive As Fuck kitchen towel, shown folded into thirds

    Grandma’s got her holiday on. You could even say I’m... festive as fuck.

    You too can express the fuck levels of your festivity by getting your very own Festive As Fuck kitchen towel.